I was convinced that my life was back on track, I was over the moon that I had my driving licence and therefore my freedom back and I was feeling confident in moving my life forward.
Was I over confident? Well, maybe I had forgotten that golden nugget of information that Albie is a Grade 4 Glioblastoma Multiforme Brain Tumour and is nicknamed The Terminator!
It was time to go and get my latest scan results, in my mind this would be the usual pop my head into the office get the nod for the all clear and then head home. However, today there was something different………. Also in the room was a Macmillan Nurse, I have previously said that this is usually a giveaway that some bad news in on the way, however, I was feeling so positive I just ignored this and sat down.
The Oncologist asked how I was feeling and if anything had changed since the last time he saw me. I said I was feeling great and with a beaming smile said well yeah actually, something has changed…… I’ve now got my driving licence back, unless you are going to say something to change that, I don’t know why I said that… I shouldn’t have opened my big mouth as he simply replied with a smirk…. “well, there is a change to the cells, which is classed as a recurrence”.
BOOM!!! Absolutely from nowhere Albie had leapt up from wherever he had been hiding and hit me with a knockout blow! Not because he was affecting me physically in anyway, I still felt great in myself, but because he had now reappeared the recurrence meant I would no longer be driving!
I couldn’t believe it, Albie’s timing was the worst….. I had only had my licence back a week and now it was gone again for at least another two years!
The Macmillan Nurse could see that I was clearly upset and tried to reassure me by saying you probably won’t notice but the tumour will affect your ability to drive. Whilst I was happy to follow the rules and no longer drive, I did have to argue that my driving ability was currently okay. In the week that I had my licence back I had:
- Driven 1200 miles, you could say I had been enjoying it!
- I also had to do a driving assessment in order to be able to use cars for work. When I arrived at the test centre, I gave the instructor my new shiny new licence that had only been issued that week, he looked a little worried, I then I followed it up with “I haven’t driven for three years!” He now looked petrified and I wasn’t sure if he was going to let me out in his car. I did say well I drove here alright, so should be okay. He seemed nervous but off we went, once we were out he calmed down and was full of nothing but praise, after an hour of driving him around we were back to the test centre and I had a big tick in the box. This meant nothing other than for work purposes but did give me confidence that I was safe on the road, not that I needed it!
I had enjoyed, well loved, my week of driving but now had to reset that counter and just take the pain for another two years!
So now I had come to terms with that, there was the small matter about what we were going to do with Albie….. The answer was simple, hit him with some more chemo!! That’s right, I went into the office feeling great and that my life was fully back on track, little did I know that thirty minutes later I would no longer be driving and worse than that, I would be swapping my driving licence for another six month course of Temozolomide chemotherapy treatment!
I was gutted, Albie had definitely won that round but I wasn’t ready to give up…. After signing the consent forms and having my weight and blood taken I was off to the pharmacy to collect the tablets and start the chemo immediately. It certainly wasn’t the day that I was expecting and a real reality check……… THE FIGHT CONTINUES!!!!!